Tuesday, March 22, 2011

WHY WE PAY SEX WORKERS ………clients speak


Men are curious and generally love adventure. This statement was not foreseen as the interview with sex workers' client started. The Network of Journalists living with HIV (JLWAH) had embarked on interviews to find out why sex work is on the increase despite HIV and STI upsurge in the country. The JLWAH, Kenyan chapter, has been carrying out  interviews in a bid to reach the clients and educate them on transmission and prevention of HIV and other STIs.

But the clients interviewed had various reasons why they go out to “buy sex”. A client who sought anonymity for fear of prejudice said that he has been married for the last eight years and has had more sex with the sex workers than his wife. He lamented that his wife is ever on board, a flight. He noted that she is either in a workshop out of the country or she is busy preparing for a meeting.  “We hardly have time as husband and wife!”

But this was not so with yet another who said that he derived pleasure from “violent and angry sex” He confessed that whenever he is annoyed or distressed, he gets cooled down by having violent sex. This, he said, he does during the day time to avoid suspicion from his wife whom ironically he called an angel. Having been married for three years, the man pointed out that there are things he cannot do to his wife. He noted that he likes it when he beats the girl and roughly has sex with her before banging the door leaving all his stress and anger behind.

The father of one said that he has never had unprotected sex adding that he was surprised that most sex workers carried their own condoms and opted to put them on their clients. This explained the role of many organizations in Kenya in educating sex workers on safe and correct condom use. He said that the sex workers did not mind his violence but were very cautious that the condom does not burst and he pays his bill!

The spotlight indicated that most clients are married men and pay better than the single, young men. An unmarried young man was categorical that he was fond of paying the female sex workers because they are less expensive. “A wife is very expensive and offers very little,” he lamented.

He expressed that his involvement with female sex workers is non-committal. He noted that he can do away with a girl anytime he wished. He also pointed out that he opts to have different women who play different roles for payment. These roles, he said, included having sex, warming him on a cold night, or washing his clothes and cooking for him. All these are roles that a wife would do but “charge” more expensively in the name of upkeep. “Whenever I pay a sex worker, it is none of my business where she takes her money, she can buy food or have a hair-do for all I care!” he said adding that that is not so with a wife. He noted that for a wife you need to buy her clothes, feed her and meet all her other needs.
Female sex workers interviewed on violent men said that they did not mind as long as the man paid for whatever service.

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